Stop and look at what you're wearing right now. Is any part of your current wardrobe black, or have you worn a black item in the last 24 hours?

You're a perfect candidate for a Chicago winter. I've recently come to the conclusion that black is the unofficial uniform of the city.

For purposes of this argument, we're going to define “wearing black” as going out in public with at least one major black-colored garment – pants, shirt, skirt, coat, et al . This is a liberal definition, yes, but without it I would have to talk about the stereotypical traits of men in three-quarters length black leather coats and women in thigh-high black stiletto boots (compensating for something but ready to party and ready to party, respectively ), but I won't make such fine disctinctions.

By applying this defnition, I found 22 of 26 people standing on a red line el stop last week were wearing black. As one of the four dissenters, I was wearing grey and brown.Why did I miss the boat?

Black could be the norm because of disaffected, horrible winters. I've spent some time in Montreal, and witnessed the same phenomenon. Everyone had a black something on, whether that be a coat or pants or a hat.

Black could also be the norm because, umm, Illinois is a blue state, like New York , where large concentrations of hipsters live. But California is also a blue state, as is, umm, Wisconsin. Hmm. I suppose that doesn't work.

Or maybe black is the norm because it's easily paired with other colors. But that would mean just about everyone in the city has no ability to match wardrobe elements.

One last try: I'm going to go with a combination of all of the above. It's really, really cold in the winter, black is easy to match with other things and, of course, we're all just lazy in the mornings. Plus we get that cynically-detached-and-better-than-you-vibe while wearing black, so that can't be a bad thing.

In any case, make sure to be wearing something monochromatic – specifically black – this winter. Don't get caught in the cold and marked as a non-Chicagoan. Then again, black is slimming, or so I've been told. And it hides stains well, which would be a good thing if you're hosting your own dinner party.

Happy holidays, and enjoy the issue.